there was 4 little kids screaming in high pitched voices at the top of their lungs at the sox game and their mom just leaned over to me and said 'if thats not birth control i dont know what is'
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
I'm drunk from drinking bourbon out of a "cupcake sippy cup" at the Denny's bar. What the fuck happened to the goals I had?
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
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