First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.