i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
Cover your peen. We're going out.
send nudes
from the living room?
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
