As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
Randomize
