a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
You Will Never Meet Anyone More Annoying Than These 23 People
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
These 23 People Prove You Don’t Have To Be A 10 To Be Good In Bed
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?