Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
false alarm. still invincible.
So I'm driving and this guy next to me at the stop light is reving his engine and honking at me. Motherfucker thinks that's because I'm asian and drive a honda I'm automatically going to race him
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
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she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
I just found a bag of teeth...
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
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Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence