Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
Drinking non-alcoholic beer is like going down on your cousin.
Sure it tastes the same, but it ain't right.
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
