i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
Randomize
