I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
Randomize
