im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
Def don't remember taking those pics I sent you...but it looks like I was in a car? Shit. Looks like my Uber passenger rating just went up exponentially.
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