Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
