Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
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