I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
Randomize
