Dude there are two smokin hot chicks laying outside my apartment...I almost want to tell them theyre laying where I threw up last night
U should. Its a good ice breaker
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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