She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
he fucked my hip out of place.
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
I hate closet cases. I've been wooing this chick the entire quarantine. We finally meet up tonight, we're two drinks in, I've got my hand half way up her skirt and her husband calls. She promised to bring home dinner.
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