do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
Randomize
