I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
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