butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
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