Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
I like my sex mixed with concussions.
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
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