Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Poland
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
I think your dad took our porno
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
Randomize
