Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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