stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
When did we convert life to cartoon?
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
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