i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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