You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
He literally asked permission to hit on me
Randomize
