guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
so I was like, you know platform 9 3/4? I know something else with those measurements. best. pick up line. ever.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
I'm in the grocery store cradling a box of wine like it's my firstborn, so of course this would be the first and only time I've ever seen my boss outside of the office.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
Randomize
