just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
I just found out through a drunken phone call that my parents thought I'd grow up to be a porn star. It's kind of scary how accurate they were at how skilled I'd be at sex.
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
Randomize
