That chick was all over your bacon last night, grinding on you, I thought you were going to bang her in the club
Dude it was a lap dance
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
Randomize
