Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
drinking out of a sandbucket again
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
Randomize
