Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
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