So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
Randomize
