does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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