How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
Randomize
