I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
Banned from zoo.
Again?
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
Couch. On fire.
Randomize
