Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
Randomize
