the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
Randomize
