But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
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