The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
Randomize
