now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
Randomize
