it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
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You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
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This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
Boobs are out for the taking
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
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