From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
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