I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
Randomize