She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
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