The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
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