she's into porn, im staying here tonight
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
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