I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
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