I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
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