On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
it was like eating out sand paper
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
