I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Randomize
