he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
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