Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
Randomize
