dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
i haven't been laid since the bush administration. it's frustrating.
Some advice for success: 1) Go ugly early, it saves you time and money; 2) If you can't pork a princess, pound a pig for practice; and 3) Beauty is only a light switch away.
ur like the dr phil of bizarro world.
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
Is it penis luge time yet?
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
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