Texts From Last Night

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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.

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  (617): That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head. http://tfl.nu/g2zg
  Replies (19) Good night (975) Bad night (4553)
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  (910): View more from North Carolina

  so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants

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  (910): so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants http://tfl.nu/bero
  Replies (42) Good night (639) Bad night (11968)
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  (636): View more from Missouri

  I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.

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  (636): I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap. http://tfl.nu/1yuw
  Replies (56) Good night (1086) Bad night (3237)
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  (240): View more from Maryland

  I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.

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  (240): I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian. http://tfl.nu/grua
  Replies (20) Good night (2760) Bad night (4428)
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  (402): View more from Nebraska

  Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.

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  (402): Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then. http://tfl.nu/941i
  Replies (24) Good night (5052) Bad night (1126)
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  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street

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  (724): the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street http://tfl.nu/sbee
  Replies (13) Good night (4539) Bad night (1490)
• Favorite

  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.

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  (484): It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over. http://tfl.nu/cnrb
  Replies (1) Good night (1791) Bad night (757)
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  (865): View more from Tennessee

  What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?

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  (865): What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"? http://tfl.nu/h7i9
  Replies (11) Good night (2379) Bad night (1766)
• Favorite

  (802): View more from Vermont

  I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.

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  (802): I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday. http://tfl.nu/gxw8
  Replies (7) Good night (1498) Bad night (490)
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  (951): View more from California

  diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.

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  (951): diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me. http://tfl.nu/ieik
  Replies (12) Good night (3058) Bad night (578)
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  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire

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  (484): if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire http://tfl.nu/0try
  Replies (14) Good night (2482) Bad night (790)
• Favorite

  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame

  (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  That is a hangover

  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  I would prefer a headache

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  (215): Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame (267): That is a hangover (215): I would prefer a headache http://tfl.nu/ewcu
  Replies (3) Good night (1239) Bad night (527)
• Favorite

  (479): View more from Arkansas

  I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.

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  (479): I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW. http://tfl.nu/32cb
  Replies (1) Good night (649) Bad night (515)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.

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  (303): My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow. http://tfl.nu/0900
  Replies (6) Good night (1091) Bad night (423)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?

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  (303): can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself? http://tfl.nu/x2xl
  Replies (8) Good night (1261) Bad night (391)

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